- PROLOG -
As a prologue, let's sigh that unfortunately it's impossible to publish with the "comments off" function, I would love to write my own blogs in a diary form, but the last thing I want is for users to vomit their thought processes underneath... it's like "he got a pub, but he had people coming in" :D ...
So unfortunately blogs are forbidden to me and short stories in general have a lot less readers and comments. I hope this "short story" will be so boring that it won't interest anyone at all. So I write only for myself, and I don't care about the opinion of the readership.
background music : Billie Eilish - Bored
I.
You fucked up....
Fucked up, man
fucked up
and I REALLY just wanted to
- I WANTED YOU -
The funny thing is, you're gonna tell me
"I'm not fucking with your head"
jeez really?!
..............
I'd rather not say anything
if I let my head get fucked up
(crooked smile)
at my age
*
I'm a real sucker
and a brat
with highly developed defense mechanism
that won't let me humiliate myself enough
to show
that he's hit the right spot
AGAIN
Interesting,
I picked a slightly different type than that
- NEMESIS -
(aka fucking FIIUR)
but the bastard still had it in for me
Past tense, man
- Past tense -
last time
background music : ME & U · Madeaux
II.
(He) always has a real basis
=
the object of my imagination exists
(like yeah, there was one episode with a completely fictional nativeShoshon BUT he had a basis in a real person)
it's safe
he'll never do anything,
that I don't want to
he'll never say
what
I don't want to hear
He's
PERFECT
(how else)
and so I play with it,
discreetly circling around the realistic image,
waiting to see what it will release,
pouncing on it like a hyena,
like a glue-sniffing junkie,
and ooh,
I indulge in fantasy orgies
and
daydreams
III.
*
Under the thin fabric of azure leggings
*
dedicated to : Bastard with the Secret
background music : Ocean Eyes - covered by Machine Gun Kelly
- prologue -
Dear Reader ------ fuck off
Sorry I just had to do that
:D
…why am I writing this fantasy, I'm writing it mostly for myself,
I just sent you the fuck away because this is mine :
dreaming....I'm dreaming
all the time and about everything,
about sex...
about sex
No, it's not sex,
it's a shag where...
no-wait-otherwise
I'll take you to the hotel
----------
you get it,
I've been changing my panties twice a day since Thursday
- getting so sick of this -
you bastard
sitting on the bench, I'm just kind of leaning back with my body facing him,
sipping tea
I can feel the energy
Shit-shit-shit-shit
but I don't let it consume me,
I flick my eyes
anchor on the leaves moving in the wind
AND
the smell....
your smell.....
fuck
You're telling me something
and I know
when I look into your eyes,
I can't let myself get stuck
NO EYE FUCKING!!!
I feel like I'm completely burning
I'm fucking dying
Get your shit together
(how old are you, girl??? I'm laughing inside myself)
U
motherfucker
I'm gonna enjoy you now
throw my leg over the bench
lean into you a little bit
move in closer
watching me do it,
slightly surprised and amused
You see
HER
pussy
looming beneath
the thin fabric of azure leggings
background music : Billie Eilish - when the party's over (Live on the Howard Stern Show)
Lewis Capaldi - when the party’s over (better or worse…)
- EPILOGUE -
the girl who's got it all wrong
----------------
Ok well, the last thing I need to hear is :
- you're beautiful -
- I want you -
- come on a date -
- come anywhere -
- we have to see each other -
---
what do I need to hear?
Nothing...
I'm nothing
He told me...
*
I AM NOTHING
*
WE ARE NOTHING
*
...I don't feel nothing
PS: this isn't a haiku :P as much as I'd like to
PPS: fantasy III is 69% real :)
